June 30, 2008

Gambol Like Calves

But unto you who revere and worshipfully fear My name shall the Sun of Righteousness arise with healing in His wings and His beams, and you shall go forth and gambol like calves [released] from the stall and leap for joy.

Five years ago a phone call came I never imagined I’d receive. I remember the exact place I was sitting, the time of day, the air I breathed. My parents were on the other line.

“Honey, we need to tell you something. Mom got her results back from the doctor. It’s cancer.”

Complete silence. I couldn’t process anything except how the carpet felt under my toes. Stiff, but somehow soft.

But for you who fear my name, the Sun of Righteousness will rise with healing in his wings. And you will go free, leaping with joy like calves let out to pasture.

Then a thousand thoughts rushed through my mind. A thousand emotions slammed my heart. Fear, panic, helplessness, grief. I cried. Discussed the prognosis. Treatment. The Road ahead. We talked a long time and then hung up the phone.

But unto you that fear my name shall the Sun of righteousness arise with healing in his wings; and ye shall go forth, and grow up as calves of the stall.

Helplessness strangled me. I thought about driving home, but lived hundreds of miles away. Then my heart turned a corner and a small light clicked on. “Search my Word sweetheart. See what My thoughts are. Find my emotions about your mom.” Barely could I choke out my reply, “I don’t even know where to begin Lord.” “That’s okay…I’ll lead; you follow.”

The sun of righteousness will dawn on those who honor my name, healing radiating from its wings. You will be bursting with energy, like colts frisky and frolicking.

“Look up Malachi 4:2.” In blind numbness, my fingers found the book, flipped to the chapter, and scanned verse 2. I’d never read this verse before. Amazement and awe, peace and purpose, daring and delight replaced fear, doubt, hurt, and mistrust. And God gently reminded me He courts our hearts much like a suitor courts the delight of his eyes. Like a young man pursuing the heart of his beloved, God pursued my heart with His Word and Truth.

But for you who revere my name, the sun of righteousness will rise with healing in its wings. And you will go out and leap like calves released from the stall.

This verse was our proclaimation of the Lord’s favor through my mom’s cancer. The cancer that spread within 1/8 of a centimeter from infecting her other organs. 1/8 of a centimeter!! I picture God’s enormous hands (big enough to hold the world!) sizing down to 1/8 of a centimeter, placing them between my mom’s organs and declaring, “This far, and no farther.”

God rose with healing in His wings, spread them over my mom, and she has been cancer-free almost five years! Praise the Lord! We rejoice in Your mighty sovereignty! You never leave us or forsake us. Thank you Jesus. Thank you God Almighty. Your ways are great indeed.

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